The light from the movie screen illuminated his face, a bright, wide smile. He laughed hard at the screen and when we looked at the screen we saw Chuck Danes in his first straight role—falling face first into a cake. His wife looked on, horrified. Kenny looked on at the screen in wonder.
⬟
Kenny got home and immediately washed his face, then decided to lie down in his bed. On his tilted ceiling was a poster of Chuck Danes, the world's greatest and most famous gay actor, Kenny’s favorite actor.
“I wish I could be you,” said Kenny into the room, and sighed. He picked up a cigarette case from his nightstand and plucked out a cigarette, popped it into his mouth, then lit it. He took a long drag. He heard a knock at the door.
Kenny got up and walked to the door. It was Samson. He opened the door.
“What are you doing here?” asked Kenny.
Samson pulled out a bouquet of flowers.
“How did you get my address?” asked Kenny.
“I may have looked thru your wallet.”
Kenny silently stared. He wasn’t alarmed or moved in any way.
“I thought maybe…” said Samson, “we could play today?”
“I’m not working today.”
“Why do you have to say that?” said Samson.
“Get out of here.”
“Are you sure?”
“Get the fuck out of here, Samson!”
“Okay, okay…” he muttered as his head and hands fell.
He dropped the bouquet on the lawn as he walked back to his car. Kenny slammed the door, looking through the diamond shaped glass until he heard the sound of the engine running off. “Jesus,” he muttered and went back to bed.
⬟
“We want you to peel off the back hooves of the horse and eat him out,” said the director. “Make it look passionate. I don’t have time to shoot this more than two times.”
“Okay,” Kenny nodded, seriously.
“And don’t stop jerking yrself off the whole time. We want you to look like an unsatisfiable pervert.”
“Okay.” Kenny was nervous. It was his first scene. He put his heart and soul into it.
“And—action!”
He gently stroked the hard body of the ugly man in a horse costume. Got him on the couch and peeled off his back two legs all while jerking himself off. His cock was hard enough but he was nerve-racked so he wasn’t at peak performance. He peeled away the bottoms and stroked the big round muscular ass cheeks like one would push away hair from a lover's soft face, spread the cheeks and started rimming. He had done this privately a thousand times but felt shy doing it on camera. He tried to act natural. He felt like he had gone on for too long when finally the director shouted, “AND CUT! Great job, Kenny. We’re gonna shoot that scene once more just in case. You were perfect.” Kenny wiped off his mouth, displeasurably licked his lips while Ponyboy pulled his pants up. They took their places ready to start the scene again.
⬟
On Instagram, Chuck Danes Verified posted progress pics from a six month bulk for the new Fast and the Furious film. His chiseled six-pack abs underneath his firm, big, muscular tits of steel. He was flexing and oiled, shiny, bright, and perfectly tan in a black background. Kenny smashed the like button then comments, three hearts, “incredible!,” and three hearts.
⬟
At Paris Lounge in uptown Dallas, Texas, Kenny, dressed in a white Tuxedo waited for instruction from leader of his harem, Astrid Miller. Kenny was thinking about Hollywood when interrupted.
“Kenny,” she said, so softly. “Tonight’s a big night for you. I want you to meet someone new tonight. They’re a big client, he’s from Hollywood—a talent agent/producer, named Marlow. He’s a very discreet person, wants things on the hush hush.”
Kenny nodded.
“Great. He’ll be coming in soon, we know you’re a great escort; we wanted to give him to the best.”
“I’m honored,” he said.
⬟
When Marlow entered The Paris Lounge Kenny was in awe. He never expected such a handsome man to be a customer. It seemed redundant. What does a chiseled blonde with shining green eyes need an escort for? But Kenny knew the weight that this night held and forgot about it. He was nervous like he was nervous on a first date. He was rarely attracted to his customers and Kenny, as often as he thought of Hollywood, had never actually met someone from Hollywood before. He’d lived his entire life in Dallas, Texas. He shook Marlow's hand and was star-struck; wow, someone really from Hollywood.
“You look just like an old friend I’d had when I was young,” Marlow said before Kenny could say anything.
“I hope that’s a good thing,” said Kenny.
“I was in love,” said Marlow.
Kenny blushed.
“Do you want to get something to drink?” asked Kenny.
“Absolutely, I’ll have a whiskey.”
“I’ll have one too,” said Kenny.
They sat at the bar together and drank.
“I hear yr from Hollywood,” said Kenny.
“I am. Been working in Hollywood for twenty years. Originally wanted to be an actor but decided it wasn’t for me.”
Kenny wasn’t surprised but was confused.
Who wouldn’t they want to be an actor, especially when they looked like Marlow?
“Any recent projects?”
“Do you know Chuck Danes?”
“Yeah, I love Chuck Danes, he’s my hero.”
“I’m producing the new Fast and the Furious movie with Chuck Danes.”
“Wow,” said Kenny, sincerely moved. “I Want to be an actor one day, move to Hollywood.”
“Where are you from, Kenny? What brings you to Dallas, Texas?” He knew his name already because Astrid told him.
“Here, in Dallas, Texas. I’ve lived here my whole life,” he said.
“Sounds like it.” Marlow winked and smiled. His bright green eyes shined.
“I’ve got a feeling I’m gonna like you, Kenny,” said Marlow.
Marlow smiled.
Kenny smiled back.
⬟
When Kenny got home, he jumped on his bed, gave a kiss to his two fingers and jumped up to slap it onto Chuck Danes lips. Then fell into bed and had a dream.
In the dream he is bench pressing a three-plate lift while Chuck Danes spots him. As he finishes the rep they kiss. When he woke up he was dazed and depressed. He, for a moment, believed Chuck was really there.
⬟
The next night Kenny met Samson at The Paris Lounge. They had a few drinks and went out to see a movie. Kenny, who had been on several movie dates with customers at work, had seen them all but he was glad to watch The Birthday Movie starring Chuck Danes again. Kenny loved every movie Chuck Danes was in. He would love to fantasize about someone else besides Samson for a few hours. Samson was 6’1” and fat, with long, gray hair. Not the ugliest man he’d ever seen but nothing special; it’s all just work. It’s all just body after body. In the theater Samson tried to hold Kenny’s hand.
Kenny moved his hand away. He didn’t mind walking arm in arm but he didn’t want to hold his hand and he didn’t have to hold his hand. In the movie theater Samson tried kissing Kenny. Kenny moved away. Kenny didn’t want to and he didn’t have to. After the movie let out Samson, munching on grips of popcorn from a red and white striped bucket asked, “Do you want to come over?”
Nothing unusual about it. Kenny agreed. At Samson’s house he poured them both a glass of wine. Samson and Kenny both gulped it down faster than they should.
“Heh heh, looks like we both could use a little more wine.”
They both drank their glasses down fast. Samson tried holding Kenny’s hand. Kenny moved it and said, “You know I don’t do that.” Samson looked disappointed.
“Goddammit, Kenny. You can’t even kiss me. Am I that disgusting?” Kenny didn’t answer.
“I think I should go,” said Kenny.
“One second,” said Samson. He left the room.
Kenny nervously sipped from the empty wineglass for its last remnants. When he looked back over his shoulder he was face to face with the barrel of a gun. He heard the gun click to load. “You’re always brushing me off. I know what yr for, you little slut. Get up.”
Kenny put his arms up.
“Samson,” Kenny said. “Put the gun down. You don’t know what you’re doing.”
“I know exactly what I’m doing. I’ve wanted you for a long time. Now take off your clothes.”
“Samson, put down the gun.”
He waved the pistol wildly, jabbing the nose into Kenny’s.
“Take off your fucking clothes, now.”
Kenny stuttered, “S-S-Samson.”
“NOW.”
Kenny was shaking now. He could hardly unbutton the first button. That’s when Samson came across the other side of the couch, treading thru the cushions, with the gun still pressed into Kenny’s head and started unbuttoning Kenny’s shirt.
“You think life’s so easy 'cause you’re so beautiful.” He was halfway down the shirt. “And you can have anyone you want.” It was fully unbuttoned. “Take it off,” he lisped. Samson started feeling every point of Kenny’s chest, palms, flat against his chest.
“Now yr pants.” Samson moved the gun up to Kenny’s temple. Kenny slowly unbuckled his belt, undid the brass buttons on his jeans, and let his pants drop.
“Now yr boxers,” Samson said.
Kenny pulled down his boxers.
That’s when Samson reached straight into his jeans and started pumping. His enormous cock breaking thru his loose jeans. Kenny did his best to play with himself. He thought of his last shoot. He couldn’t get hard. Samson’s eyes fluttered, his breathing got heavier. He pumped furiously, staring at Kenny’s ripped body, and came, an enormous shot of wet heat stained Samson’s jeans. He almost fell over in orgasm. He slowly took his hands out of his jeans, zipped up his pants, shook his hand free of any come and said, “You can put them back on now. I’ll drive you home.”
Kenny put back on his clothes and ran out.
⬟
The next day at a shoot the director explained, “This is going to be a little more extreme, Kenny.”
“Okay,” said Kenny, not all there from last night.
“We want you to slowly work your fist into this guy's asshole. Classic fisting technique. We need you to be careful, Work alongside Tytus, know his limits, but we want you to get in there and really fist his asshole.” Kenny had never fisted an asshole before. He had seen it in porn before and never thought anymore of it. He was horrified by the thought of fisting an asshole, even if it was clean. Sex at all at this point disgusted him but it’s what he was paid to do. They set up the scene. Kenny in a white coat and his costar on all fours spreading his asshole for Kenny.
“Honestly, I’m not sure how I should…”
Someone from production came forward, put on a blue glove, and coached Kenny on how to safely fist his costar. She got as far as one finger when Kenny imagined a gun pressed to his temple. She asked Kenny if he was doing all right. Is he getting it? And Kenny responded with a silent and serious nod. He was not okay but he said he was because several people were depending on him for this shoot. He was a little disgusted with himself and very disgusted with the task, but he had been here before. This is show business. The show must go on. Kenny was thinking about Hollywood when production got her fist in the asshole. She asked him if he was okay again like she didn’t care about the answer because she really didn’t care and she went thru the labor of fisting a guy's asshole and she really cared about getting this scene done because everything normal depended on Kenny fisting this guy's asshole with a look of deep erotic fulfillment.
“Action!”
Kenny managed to finger his costar's asshole passionately but couldn’t get hard at all. He kept going, deeper and deeper with a finesse he didn’t imagine in dealing with a man's ass lips. He managed his fist in and at that point, having shut out all the moaning and shouting, took three seconds to hear the “Cut. Cut. Cut. Cut. Kenny—you were fantastic...except for the fact that you’re not hard.” Kenny slowly, carefully, pulled his fist out of his costar's asshole.
“Let’s do it again. Jerk yourself off if you have to.”
Kenny nodded.
Kenny started fingering the asshole, passionately jerking himself off. It went on for too long. The moaning turned him off and then he felt it again, a gun in his temple and that’s when he got hard. He imagined the entire scene at gunpoint. He started moaning.
⬟
“My name’s Kenny by the way.” He shook his costar's hand and took a drag.
“My name’s Bartholomew. You can call me Bart. You’re not gonna make enough money here to move to Hollywood. I have work if you’re interested.”
“Absolutely, would love another gig.”
“You sure? It requires a little more commitment. A little more bravery.”
“Okay.”
“You’ll need a gun.”
⬟
Kenny walked into the shop and started browsing. A man immediately walked out from behind the counter and shook his head and said, “What can I do for you?”
“I need a gun,” said Kenny.
“Clearly.” He laughed and stretched his arm out towards the cases.
“What’d you have in mind?”
“How about a Desert Eagle?” said the man.
“Sure,” said Kenny.
The man unlocked the case and gave him the gun to hold. Kenny didn’t know anything about guns. He didn’t know what a Desert Eagle was, he just thought it was a normal gun. He held it. It felt good. It was heavy. It was beautiful. He’d never held something that could kill anyone before. He imagined pressing it into Samson's head and pulling the trigger. He liked the way it felt to carry it even tho he thought he should get a smaller gun.
“How much is it?”
“1,793 dollars for the six inch barrel version,” he said.
He didn’t know guns shouldn’t cost as much as his rent.
He thought for a moment.
“I’ll take it.”
⬟
“Do you want some blow?” the Mexican asked. His name was Adolfo Cortez. He had a shaved head and a cross tattooed on his face just under his eye, which unlike his blue eye, was brown. He wasn’t open about his sexuality yet. Kenny sat and stared at the lines. Kenny was uncomfortable with hard drugs. “No, thanks,” he said. He didn’t know what else to say. People who did hard drugs usually made Kenny feel like a little kid for not doing hard drugs, which he hated and were not worth trying. They started making out. Kenny was racist and terrified of fucking Adolfo. He heard Mexican dudes had big dicks. He was attracted to Adolfo physically but didn’t know much about him. He decided to betray his innate nature to learn to connect with this person and just enjoy them sexually. But Kenny couldn’t even do that. He was peeling off Adoflo’s pants, jerking himself off before inserting into Adolfo’s perfectly sculpted ass, but couldn’t get hard. He imagined the feeling of a gun pressed into his temple and then got hard.
⬟
Kenny was counting the money on the nightstand and silently when Adolfo asked, “Are you sure you don’t want to stay?” Kenny was already getting dressed, buttoning up a red plaid flannel shirt.
“No thanks,” Kenny said grabbing his keys and coat on the way out. Adolfo heard the door slam. He started crying.
⬟
Kenny was drinking tonic water at the bar to get into character for Marlow. He was almost certain he was in love with Marlow but if he was honest he didn’t exactly know what that meant. Marlow entered, they greeted each other. Kenny was surprised by the gentlemanly kiss on the cheek.
“How are you?” asked Kenny, sincerely.
“I’m good. Been thinking about our last visit a lot.”
Kenny smiled.
Marlow smiled back.
There was an awkward silence that overthrew them. Then they were caught staring at each other and that’s when Kenny moved in. Marlow met him halfway and their lips met. The kiss was explosive, and then a slow rolling kiss that made them both feel the flash of orgasm without actually feeling the flash of orgasm.
“Thank you,” said Kenny.
Marlow smiled.
⬟
“In this scene we need you to come at the exact same time as everybody else does. It’s going to be eight guys in the circle and four guys holding you up and you’re going to cue them by grabbing Trevor’s leg. The black guy right there, he’ll be closest to you, then you’ll come while they’re all coming on you. Got it?”
“Okay,” said Kenny.
He started the scene, held up by four men each grabbing a limb, imagining a gun pressed up to his head from the beginning. He was harder than he’d ever been. He was being penetrated by the eighth in the circle. He grabbed Trevor’s legs, the eighth saw and pulled out to come on him along with everyone else. The gun went off in his head. His brains spewed up across the set and he along with everyone else came.
⬟
At Marlow’s, Kenny sat up drinking a glass of wine. Marlow was naked, putting on a record at the house that he was renting for his stay in Dallas.
“I wish I could afford a place like this,” said Kenny.
“Yeah?” said Marlow. “What is it you do besides escort to pay the bills?”
“What makes you think escorting doesn’t pay enough.”
“I’ve tried this line of work before,” he said, seriously.
“I’m an actor,” blurted Kenny.
“An actor?” said Marlow. “Why Dallas?”
“. . . a porn actor.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” said Marlow.
He started getting dressed.
“You should get dressed,” said Marlow.
“What did I say?”
“Everyone needs a job,” said Marlow. “And I’m not uncomfortable seeing someone who’s an escort, who doesn’t fuck everybody for money, but I am uncomfortable seeing someone who actually does have sex for money. You should get dressed,” he repeated. “I’ll take you home.” Kenny found his pants and started putting them on.
“You remind me so much of my friend,” said Marlow. Kenny laughed.
⬟
That night when Marlow went to bed he had a dream. He was kissing his first love. They were young and making love in the very bed Kenny had been in. The kisses got harder and harder, and so did Marlow. As the lover was going down on him he looked up and it was Kenny, who laughed like he had laughed when Marlow told him he reminded him so much of his "friend." As soon as Kenny’s lips touched Marlow’s cock, he woke up and started laughing.
⬟
Kenny was at Adolfo’s counting his money on the nightstand when Adolfo asked, “Do you want to stay? Maybe we can watch something?”
“No, thanks,” said Kenny, putting on his pants.
“C’mon, stay, please?” asked Adolfo.
He got up from bed, naked.
He pushed the door closed and turned around.
“Don’t have all night, Adolfo.”
“Just stay.”
“No, thanks.”
Adolfo said, “C’mon. C’mon,” and pushed him toward the bed.
Kenny resisted.
“C’mon, Adolfo. I want to leave.”
Adolfo pushed him onto the bed and started kissing him again. Kenny pushed him off and headed for the door. Adolfo pushed him again and that’s when Kenny hit him in the face. “Fuckin’ faggot!” said Adolfo, and bashed Kenny in the face. He fell to the floor. That’s when Kenny pulled from his waist his enormous and weighty Desert Eagle. He aimed it, backing up into the corner, straight at Adolfo’s head. “I swear to you motherfucker. I’ll do it. Get away from the door.” Adolfo swung. Kenny shot and the walls shook and Adolfo fell to the ground. There was blood like a shadow spattered against the wall. Adolfo got up, holding his arm. “Motherfucker!” He swung but he couldn’t get close to Kenny. Kenny was out that motherfucker.
⬟
Kenny showed up to set the next day. Basic scene, just a blowjob ending in a facial for open. He was working with Bartholomew, who didn’t, for whatever reason, say anything. After the blowjob, as Kenny was cleaning his face, he said, “You shot Adolfo. Are you fucking crazy? He called me telling me you shot him.”
“He tried to rape me.”
“Not what he told me. Look, man, this is a business—you can’t just be shooting people. He wants to kill me now.”
“Believe me, I had every reason to use that gun.”
Then Bart just stopped talking to him.
⬟
At The Paris Lounge, the cops busted in and started flashing their badges. They arrested Astrid and told everyone to go home and “never come back.” This was a routine brothel bust. It wasn’t a brothel but it wasn’t legal either. Kenny walked out with his bow tie in his hand and smashed his glass of tonic water against the side of the dumpster on his way out. “Hey,” a cop shouted. “Fuck you,” muttered Kenny, and he went home and felt better than he ever had.
⬟
During a scene where a butt plug gets pulled out of Kenny’s ass, Marlow barged in and saw Bart getting his dick sucked by another black guy as it was happening. Just before he finished, Marlow announced that he was in love with Kenny. “I love you!” he shouted. Kenny came without the aid of a gun pressed into his temple. “Cut!” shouted the director. “Who let this fucker on set?”
“I love you too,” said Kenny.
⬟
In Hollywood, Kenny Firth was alongside Chuck Danes. Kenny was bench pressing a three-plate lift, even though it was a prop. He kissed Chuck Danes from below on the last rep. The director shouted cut. The scene ended and the set changed. Marlow gave a thumbs up to Kenny for his performance. “Great job,” said Kenny. “Thank you, Chuck Danes. It’s an honor to be here. You’re my hero.” Kenny smiled. Chuck Danes smiled back.
________
Little Tank is on X/Twitter @xlittletankx
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